Many times in the course of intense mania or psychosis context becomes very difficult to grasp. You can begin to loose social context, introspection, orientation or even awareness that you are held within such a state. This effect is amplified during \u201cOnset\u201d or the first time that an individual experiences symptoms. During my Onset it took me several months to realize that my brain had stopped working in the way in which I was accustomed. There were very few people around me who knew me well enough to notice a change since I had just arrived at college. Even once I began to realize what was happening there were few who could help, I turned to music, a decision that probably saved my life. Something about music helped my simplify my feelings and consolidate them. I soon found Grunge, a raw and organic genera of rock from the early 90\u2019s. I found comfort in relating to music written by those just as angry and confused as myself. Day after day unto this day this music gives me a venue to mentally purge and perform self-exorcism.<\/p>\n
Now, I understand that not everyone is able to so closely relate to music in this way. However, I think that music can be a great tool to supplement other treatment. Most importantly, music mixes will all forms of medication (regardless if you were prescribed the right kind), can be effective no matter the \u201cdiagnosis\u201d (even if the doctor got it wrong) or even if no one believes you.<\/p>\n
Since my Onset I have done a lot of headbanging and air guitaring. I find it a way to channel all of my confusion, hate, sadness and perhaps even my loneliness. I doubt that many will understand just how important this is to me. It has stopped to be just expression, but part of my survival.
\nI found that different songs, artists and styles were more or less effective based on my mania, depression, psychosis or even sanity. I highly encourage music therapy; some may prefer more calming styles of music\u2026or perhaps something with more than 3 chords. The point here is to find something with tone and\/or lyrics that you can relate to. On that note, sometimes trying to cheer yourself up isn\u2019t the best thing for you. To be perfectly honest, you will always have those around you that will try to cheer you up, even if it isn\u2019t what you want. You have the right to be angry, furious. Therefore, you also have the right to a healthy outlet. This can be one of those.<\/p>\n
Below are a few songs that have been very important to me, I hope they can bring you a similar sense of meaning and resolve.<\/p>\n
-Erich Zann (pen name)<\/p>\n
Erich is the pen name of our guest student blogger who can be contacted by e-mail at: thestrangemusicdeferred@gmail.com<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cShe scratches a letter
\nInto a wall made of stone
\nMaybe someday
\nAnother child
\nWon’t feel as alone as she does<\/p>\n
It’s been two years
\nAnd counting
\nSince they put her in this place
\nShe’s been diagnosed
\nBy some stupid ****
\nAnd mommy agrees
\nWhy go home?\u201d<\/p>\n
-Pearl Jam: \u201cWhy Go?\u201d (Ten)<\/p>\n
\u201cTo put my mind to bed.
\nThis ringing in my head,
\nIs this a cure ,
\nOr is this a disease?<\/p>\n
Nail in my hand,
\nFrom my creator.
\nYou gave me life,
\nNow show me how to live.\u201d
\n-Audioslave: \u201cShow Me How to Live\u201d (Audioslave)<\/p>\n
\u201cOn an evening such as this,
\nIt’s hard to tell if I exist.\u201d
\n-Barenaked Ladies: \u201cPinch Me\u201d (Maroon)<\/p>\n
\u201cLike autumn leaves
\nHis sense fell from him
\nAn empty glass of himself
\nShattered somewhere within
\nHis thoughts like a hundred moths
\nTrapped in a lampshade
\nSomewhere within
\nTheir wings banging and burning
\nOn through endless nights
\nForever awake he lies shaking and starving
\nPraying for someone to turn off the light\u201d
\n-Rage Against The Machine: \u201cBorn of a Broken Man\u201d (Battle Of Los Angeles)<\/p>\n
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guest bloggers do not necessarily represent the views of Disability Access Services or those of Oregon State University.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Many times in the course of intense mania or psychosis context becomes very difficult to grasp. You can begin to loose social context, introspection, orientation or even awareness that you are held within such a state. This effect is amplified during \u201cOnset\u201d or the first time that an individual experiences symptoms. During my Onset it… Continue reading